What I've Learned (So Far) About Being a Lagan

So I have been a Lagan for a little over a month now and I have come to realize that marrying into the family does not solely mean that your last name changes. It also includes becoming a part of completely new culture! In case you didn't know, the Lagans are a very unique species. They have numerous rituals, traditions, pastimes, and even their own language. I appreciate this culture that they have, for at the heart of it is a deeply rooted comradery and love for one another, and they value who they are both as individuals and as a unit. 

So, don't be surprised if every now and then I update you on a new facet of various Laganisms, termed Lagan Lore within the realm of Lagandom, (or Kingdom Lagan, Lagan Manor, or sometimes the Lagan Estates. We inhabit "the west wing," "the eastern corridor," and on occasion "the land beyond the library.")  so that you may all have an idea of what I encounter on a regular basis. 

First, I would like to introduce you to...the S Word!

In the Lagan home, the S Word does not in fact refer to a profane term; it refers to that dreaded seasoning agent...salt. If any of you know Mrs. Lagan at all, she tries very hard to teach her children to eat healthy food, and this includes teaching them to watch how much salt they consume. Of course, the Lagan kids make a bigger deal out of things than they really are, just for the sake of emphasis I'm sure, so they make it sound as if their well meaning mother deprives them of all sodium substances. This being said, they often whisper under their breath at the dinner table, "Please pass the S Word." :)

The newest thing I've been introduced to is the Lagan propensity to abbreviate everything. They even shortened the word "abbreviate" to abreve! They will just start abbreveing words in the middle of sentences and I have to go through a list of words in my head that could fit in that spot before I figure out what they're talking about. I will give you an example...

The most popular card game in the house right now is Monopoly Deal (Monopoly made into a card game). It is affectionately referred to as Monopo. Soda is "sode" (I'm only including the e so that you can pronounce it properly; of course they wouldn't spell it out so that it is phonetically accurate). Etc, etc, you get the idea. But my favorite abbreviated word at present is...butter! :)

You've probably guessed right now how this one sounds. That's right-butt. It's ironic to me that no matter how hard Mrs. Lagan tries to protect her children from using vulgar terms like butt when referencing the rear end of something that they manage to find a way around it and use it anyway. Poor Mrs. Lagan. I honestly think that it's the most used word in the house right now. 

The other night Jordan was in charge of the garlic bread and he told me to guess what he put on it. I thought and thought and after giving up said, "I don't know. What?" He looks at me with a sly grin and says, "Butt." Another incident occurred when Daniel and I passed by Ezra in the library. He was sitting in the chair, reading a book, and munching on a Butterfinger candy bar. Daniel declares, "Hey, how's the Butt Fing?" Ezra grins. It's common knowledge now that if you want to butter your toast in the morning you say, "Please pass the butt." You can hear this phrase uttered nearly five times during one meal. 

I get a kick out of it, but inside I'm secretly wondering who will be the first to accidently utter it in the presence of a dinner guest.

That's all for now. Stay tuned for more fun from the realm of Lagandom.

~Kaydrie